Long story short, I needed an escape. Thank goodness for characters with great senses of humor.
This is also a tip of the hat to the Sherlock Holmes movie{'09}, which I love :)
“Well, that’s a new one,” Cilla said, pulling a long, slippery squidge of riverweed from her dripping hair. “Jumping off Clifton bridge, well done old man. I would never have known you were afraid of heights,”
Beside her Tovah made a distinctive “cha” noise.
“What?”
He pulled off his boot and tried squeezing the water out of it. “I didn’t say anything,” he muttered. Then he gave a short hysterical bark of laughter. “When have I ever said anything?”
Cilla blinked. “I’m not sure I follow you, young mutton.”
He turned to face her, the laughter gone and only the hysterics left in his eyes. “Oh yes you do. Why I ever follow you on your silly adventures, I’ll never know. I must be mad. Or maybe just eternally optimistic the this time, this time nothing bad will happen, this time...”
“You’re referring to the goat incident, I take it?”
He glared. Cilla sometimes wished she had such dark eyes so that she could look so formidable when she gave someone the evil eye.
“Yes, I am referring to the goat incident, and every incident in between,”
“So you’re complaining about my ability to lead a successful escapade, is that it?”
“Complaining? Complaining? Cilla, I call this log to witness that I never so much as opened my mouth when you decided that the quickest way home was through the poison oak thicket,”
“That wasn’t entirely my fault. We hadn’t even begun our woodland learnings,”
“I’ve never complained when your farret -”
“Mink.”
“- mink - steals my clothes to make a nest; Or when you spiked my waterbag with tamarind* -”
“That was meant from Jarvis,”
“- Or when you threw that fruit at the bailiff because you thought he was insulting. You had the whole bloody village after us! We could have been drawn and quartered!”
Cilla cocked her head with a lopsided grin. She wasn’t going to deny it.
“Or, or, or! Do you want me to go on, Cilla? We could be here all day but for your benefit I will continue...”
Thankfully he did not but went back to removing river water from his person with a short sigh. “I must be going insane.” he muttered.
For awhile Cilla just sat admiring the sun in the green treetops, a blissful smile on her face. Water had never bothered her, even now when one ear was full of it, it didn’t dampen her spirits. Exciting adventures always seemed to give her an afterglow, despite gloomy Mr Soggy Trousers behind her.
“Insanity may have something to do with it,” she said. “A great deal in fact. But I can think of another reason,”
Tovah grunted.
“You’re my best friend.” She smiled and stuffed the wad of riverweed down the back of his shirt.
*a laxative herb
Beside her Tovah made a distinctive “cha” noise.
“What?”
He pulled off his boot and tried squeezing the water out of it. “I didn’t say anything,” he muttered. Then he gave a short hysterical bark of laughter. “When have I ever said anything?”
Cilla blinked. “I’m not sure I follow you, young mutton.”
He turned to face her, the laughter gone and only the hysterics left in his eyes. “Oh yes you do. Why I ever follow you on your silly adventures, I’ll never know. I must be mad. Or maybe just eternally optimistic the this time, this time nothing bad will happen, this time...”
“You’re referring to the goat incident, I take it?”
He glared. Cilla sometimes wished she had such dark eyes so that she could look so formidable when she gave someone the evil eye.
“Yes, I am referring to the goat incident, and every incident in between,”
“So you’re complaining about my ability to lead a successful escapade, is that it?”
“Complaining? Complaining? Cilla, I call this log to witness that I never so much as opened my mouth when you decided that the quickest way home was through the poison oak thicket,”
“That wasn’t entirely my fault. We hadn’t even begun our woodland learnings,”
“I’ve never complained when your farret -”
“Mink.”
“- mink - steals my clothes to make a nest; Or when you spiked my waterbag with tamarind* -”
“That was meant from Jarvis,”
“- Or when you threw that fruit at the bailiff because you thought he was insulting. You had the whole bloody village after us! We could have been drawn and quartered!”
Cilla cocked her head with a lopsided grin. She wasn’t going to deny it.
“Or, or, or! Do you want me to go on, Cilla? We could be here all day but for your benefit I will continue...”
Thankfully he did not but went back to removing river water from his person with a short sigh. “I must be going insane.” he muttered.
For awhile Cilla just sat admiring the sun in the green treetops, a blissful smile on her face. Water had never bothered her, even now when one ear was full of it, it didn’t dampen her spirits. Exciting adventures always seemed to give her an afterglow, despite gloomy Mr Soggy Trousers behind her.
“Insanity may have something to do with it,” she said. “A great deal in fact. But I can think of another reason,”
Tovah grunted.
“You’re my best friend.” She smiled and stuffed the wad of riverweed down the back of his shirt.
*a laxative herb
{Needless to say this is all strongly copyrighted: No text may be taken, in whole or in part, without my permission. So to any pests out there: Write you own story, you lurking rats!}
I'm not sure if this will find a place in the actual book {at least an edited version - this is completely first draft}, but it was a relief and joy to write something so lighthearted and unimportant in terms of plot. I often love reading these sorts of parts the best and am sad that so few writers find time in their extensive pages for a few back-and-forths that may not have any value as far as story development, but are endearing to the characters. Not to mention it's realistic. I mean, at least for me. I would definitely try and spike some one's water with something nasty if they were nasty enough. Hehe. I guess really Cilla is just a more extroverted me. I say extroverted because she can talk to people much easier than I. And she acts on her impulses when I usually listen to reason. Usually.
-Gwyn
Be on the look-out for guest posts coming soon!
